


What If?

by MidgetBanana



Category: The Arcana (Visual Novel)
Genre: Blind Character, Dom/sub Undertones, Established Relationship, Heavy Masochism, I suppose, Light Masochism, Loss of Virginity, M/M, Mild Power Play, Restraints, Rope Bondage, Rough Oral Sex, Rough Sex, Size Difference, but its mostly the MC being a filthy sub, im drunk and idk what im doing, in this universe muriel is still a virgin but he havent been livin under a rock, mild bondage, no scratch that, very brief mentions of past lucio/mc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-02
Updated: 2019-09-02
Packaged: 2020-10-05 06:00:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20484038
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MidgetBanana/pseuds/MidgetBanana
Summary: Muriel tenses up every time the apprentice touches him and the apprentice might have a solution for that.





	What If?

**Author's Note:**

> The apprentice is a blind empath with some possibly unhealthy tendencies. I want big strönk man to dom and i will not be taking criticism about how ooc it is, i am aware he would never do that. let me make him dom in peace with his big dom hands and big dom abs plz ty.

“What if…” Karayan squared his shoulders, his expression suddenly turned stern, he asked “you had absolute control?”

“‘Absolute control’ how?”

He tried to choose his words as carefully as he could, “What if I was in a position that I physically won’t be able to do anything without your explicit permission. You can decide what to do, how to do it… at your own pace.”

Muriel’s brows furrowed as the corks in his head did double time turning. Coming up short, he spoke slowly “What about you?”

“What about me?”

“What about what you…” he sucked in a shallow breath “would want to do?”

“I--” Kara trailed off. He fully intended to reveal his own preferences but as it was a delicate matter in itself, it called for cautious phrasing. “What I want more than anything is to please you.”

“If we… I mean, if I agree to it how would we…” he let the rest of the sentence hang, likely too ashamed to continue.

A reserved smile crept over Kara’s lips, softening his features “That’s entirely up to you. I am impartial to almost anything.”

He may not be able to see the horror on Muriel’s face but he could definitely hear his breathing quickening. His bewildered voice faltered as he spoke “I can’t-- That’s-- no.”

“That’s okay.” Kara rushed to reassure before the man completely broke but he kept on stuttering as if he didn’t even hear, “If I-- If I hurt you--”

“Muriel.” Kara spoke softly, it seemed to be enough to snap him out of it at least for the moment, “I guess we were bound to have this talk sooner or later…” he mumbled under his breath as he dropped himself on the nearby stoll, he sighed and took a moment of self reflection before starting, “Let’s assume that you did -hurt me, I mean- what do you imagine will happen?”

“You’ll be… in pain?”

“Quite, indeed.” he took a deep breath, and let it out, “But it’s extremely likely that I’ll also be very,  _ very  _ aroused.”

He knew Muriel must’e noticed it too, to some degree. Maybe he was in denial, the implication that Karayan’s pleasure was directly affiliated with the amount of pain he caused him might have been an unpleasant revelations. It also would’ve been a very vague conclusion to derive from this confession, but knowing Muriel, he was already struggling with it.

“You want me to hurt you?” he asked in disbelief.

Karayan really wanted to come clean, he wanted to have this discussion with the man he was with. They could’ve spent their life with borderline platonic displays of affection, but the fact that they were even having this conversation meant that they wanted to take things further. And he deserved to know about Karayan’s desires sooner rather than rather. 

“I am simply warning you, if it comes to that, you won’t get the reaction you expect. And I’d rather save you the confusion.”

He didn’t rush to answer, allowing them both some time to consider. His tone was tame when he asked, “Why?”

“It’s just the way my body responds to stimuli. It compliments my personality, Asra says.” he shrugged.

“He knows about this?”

Karayan laughed, “Of course! It would be weirder if he didn’t, we’ve been living together for years, after all.”

The rest of the talk went about as awkward as he anticipated, still, it felt good to finally come clean about this part of himself that he’d so far tried -albeit poorly- to conceal. He never thought there was something wrong with his body, he’d made peace with his quirks. Even so, he expected a harsher reaction from Muriel than the one he received. The man was reasonably confused, yet he listened… he tried to understand. 

“All I’m offering you is authority,” Kara concluded, “I trust your judgement.”

There was a long pause. ‘Trust’ had always been a sensitive subject with Muriel, which was exactly why Kara choose those words. 

“It’s so easy to-- to go too far, all it takes is a snap--” Muriel swallowed the rest of his rambling as his voice went lower and lower with each syllable.

“I trust you.”

“Why?”

“You’re not a dreadnaught, nor am I made of glass.” he shrugged. He knew the other man would need some convincing. 

Kara didn’t blame him. He was used to being treated like a delicate butterfly, that is not to say he had a skin of steel, however he was a bit more enduring than what he assumed his appearance suggested.

He tried again, “Do you intend to harm me?”

“No!”

“Then you won’t. Still, it’s up to you. What matters to me most is your comfort.”

“But this… It’s something else…”

“It isn’t. Each second we spent with each other has been about trust and boundaries, hasn’t it?”

Another silence ensued, however this time, when Muriel broke it, there was a touch less doubt in his tone “...I wouldn’t know what to do.”

“Whatever you want,” Kara chuckled, raising a brow to emphasize his next words “assuming you  _ want _ .”

* * *

So that’s how a 5’5 blind magician ended up partially bound to his own bedpost. They’d concluded, eventually, that it would be best to address this matter in Kara’s place, instead of the hut. It had been Kara’s idea, he’d said that this way Muriel would have somewhere to run off to. It was clear from his stance that he expected the scenario to play out to his disadvantage. Despite that, he didn’t act apprehensive in any way. Not when he suggested leather instead of ropes, nor when Muriel hooked a finger under the strap to assess the restraint 

“Too tight?”

Kara pulled a little at them before shaking his head. They weren’t even particularly ‘restraining’. He could probably free himself with a little work, he knew how to get out of a tough situation. 

“Are you comfortable?”

He nodded. “My arms will go numb if I’m like this for too long, though.” but somehow he doubted this would take longer than a couple of hours. 

“How long?”

“Umm… I can move around a little so it should be fine. I’ll tell you if it becomes an issue.”

So far he only had his hands tied above his head, and for today it seemed like a sufficient start. It would be enough for Muriel to decide if it’s his cup of tea. 

He could hear the man circling to the other side of the bed with the sound of wood creaking beneath his feet. He left Kara like that to contemplate on his approach.

“Should I tell you before I do… anything?” he asked stiffly. Right now, Kara was as vulnerable as he could ever be, and he always said it made him a little jumpy that he couldn’t feel Muriel’s aura.

“Depends on what you want…” his cheeks grew red, “The suspense can make the experience more… intense, but if you’re unsure about something you can always ask.”

“You know a lot about this…”

Kara dropped his head slightly, “I’m not sure how, either. It’s likely memories bleeding from my past.”

Muriel let out a low grunt. He shouldn't have said anything. He knew full well what kind of weird stuff old Karayan and the Count had been up to behind closed doors. Sometimes not even closed. He’d seen the marks Lucio and possibly others had left on his body. He’d never considered it may’ve been voluntary, always assuming he’d had an ulterior motive. He couldn’t comprehend why anyone would want to go through such an ordeal, willingly. There were aspects to intimacy Muriel didn’t know about, and the extent of it troubled him.

“I can tell you’re overthinking, again. Care to share?”

“It’s just that I’ve never…”

“Neither have I. At least not since Asra found me.”

“No, I mean--”

Kara cut him off again “So do I.”

Muriel gaped at him. Kara had been honest so far, Muriel had no reason to doubt him. Yet, he found it extremely hard to believe that a man with his appeal would never had the opportunity. He was charming, charismatic... shy, yes, yet committed nonetheless. He must’ve had suitors.

As if he read his thoughts, the man voiced them “You’re thinking ‘how’?”

“I wasn’t expecting that.” he admitted.

“You give me too much credit.” he let out a lighthearted laughter. “Though, I can’t say I’ve been actively in pursuit.”

He’d wanted to, before. He’d pursued his desires, or was Muriel wrong to assume that as well? He certainly hadn’t felt an emotional connection to Lucio, so had he complied to the Count’s will for a particular reason after all?

“Do you think… you would do it with someone you don’t want to?”

Kara’s mouth parted in confusion for a brief moment. He turned the idea in his head, more surprised by Muriel’s straightforwardness than the question itself. “...Maybe. If there’s a good reason...”

_ A reason.  _ But what reason?

The man continued, “I’d do it if you asked me to… Is that what you want?”

“No!” Muriel almost choked on the word. “No, that’s not--”

“What’s going on, Muriel?”

His tone had more concern than bafflement. Although Muriel never intended what he asked to come off that way, thinking about it now, he could see how it sounded. The concept of Kara with anybody else was unpleasant. Even just thinking back on his dalliances with the Count was enough to make Muriel’s stomach churn. He’d convinced himself that it was due to his hate for Lucio, imagining him in any intimate situation left a bad taste in his mouth. 

Now, he found it somewhat harder to hold onto that belief. Kara just confirmed that he’d submit to someone else if Muriel asked him to, even before that he’d made it clear that there were precious little things he wouldn’t do for him. This idea of having someone utterly at his mercy would’ve terrified him. Yet… it didn’t. At least not as much as he anticipated.

Maybe, he thought, he’d been going about this the wrong way. Kara had repeatedly assured him that he’d tell him if anything crossed any line, therefore the notion of ‘mercy’ seemed inaccurate. It wasn’t like he intentionally set out to harm the man and later decided otherwise, that was never the plan.

Pushing back his reservations, he placed his hand on the magician’s abdomen, making him flinch in surprise. He waited for the slight tension to seep before slipping it underneath the sweater. 

This wasn’t the first time he’d seen Kara flustered, in fact, he’d been redder when Muriel had shown a gesture as innocent as taking his hand. This time it felt different, though. This time it wasn’t the shock value that caused him to shudder under his touch, it must’ve been the anticipation he mentioned. 

He dragged his hand up, stretching the wool to its limit. There were faint hints of muscles hidden under his pale skin, shifting under Muriel’s touch. He stopped just above his heart and engulfed himself in the feel of his heartbeat beneath his palm with the rise and fall of his chest. 

He didn’t need to do anything else, he could just stop it here if he chose to. He wasn’t going to; because he wanted to do that for Kara, he wanted to please him the best he could. But he had a choice.

His other hand joined at the either side of his waist to push the cloth up and over Kara’s head, pooling it on top of the leather straps that had bound his wrists.

Even though his mouth was sealed in a thin line, the little tremor in the way he inhaled was more thrilling to Muriel than anything he’d ever experienced. He was given full authority to do as he desired, and at that moment, he desired to see the magician bare. He’d worry about what to do after later. 

He reached down to fumble with the thin strand fastened on his breeches. As soon as the knots came loose, a desperate sound escaped the man. He was quick to muffle it but he wasn’t quick enough to push himself down as his body arched in need to follow when Muriel withdrew completely, moving to the end of the bed to tug on his trouser-legs. He pulled them off with one swift motion, they came off with more ease than he thought. 

Startled by the brashness of Muriel’s action, the other man’s initial reaction was to close his legs. All it took was a gentle press on his ankles and he stilled. Not exactly going limp, he looked as if he was waiting for a directive. 

There was just one piece of cloth left in his body and he made no attempt to cover when Muriel’s fingers found their way to the fabric’s edge. When the fingers curled under it, Kara took a deep breath, and held it. 

Muriel had the patience of a saint, it wasn’t like him to be this bold. It wasn’t like him to rush to discard the only fragment of decency the other man had between him and Muriel. Alas, he wasn’t much like himself today.

He slid the cloth down to Kara’s knees, wrapped his hand around one of his thighs to bend his leg so he could free it and tossed it aside. 

He realized half a second too late what he’d done, when he had Kara’s legs spread out beneath his grasp and his exposed body entirely laid bare for his eyes. Kara trembled under his touch, winced at his slightest move but despite all he was… hard. He was genuinely enjoying this… whatever this was. All Muriel had done was to rid him of his garment, rather deprived of finesse, and yet it was enough to get him aroused. 

To have someone have this reaction under his touch, accept it so willingly as their body begged for the sensation had been unfathomable. The way Kara’s hair stood wherever Muriel’s fingers trailed made Muriel’s skin crawl.

He climbed up properly to seat himself between Kara’s legs. Pushing his knees under them, he nudged the other man’s legs up and around his waist as he pulled him to his lap. 

The man hissed at the sudden contact of his erection with the cold metal of Muriel’s belt buckle. Letting out a soft huff, Muriel unbuckled his belt, effectively easing his own arousal.

Still muzzled by his own willpower, Kara was mostly silent, safe from his ragged breathing. His brows knit together, he looked as if he was having a fight of his own. 

Muriel leaned over, covering the smaller man’s figure with his own. He hadn’t even done anything yet and the man already seemed utterly ravaged. He shoved a stray hair sticking with sweat to the side and laced his fingers through the white locks. His grip tightened above his scalp, forcing another yelp from the man. He recalled how Kara had barely curbed his reaction when Muriel had handled his hair. Back then, he thought he’d caused him discomfort but now he knew better. He pulled his hand down, a bit rougher than he intended and Kara’s entire body gave away under him. He sank his teeth in his lower lip to silence himself as his head snapped back with the force of Muriel’s pull. 

How foolish for a man to expose his throat like this. To Muriel, nonetheless. He’d told Muriel about how he’d felt his sword piercing his heart, slashing his neck open… Was he not thinking about that now, he couldn’t help but wonder. 

He placed his lips on the soft skin beneath his jaw, where Kara’s brand used to be. Even though Kara had claimed it to be a tattoo of sorts, it had eerily resembled a mark of possession. That had been Muriel’s first thought when he first laid eyes on the man many years ago. If it had been a simple skin embellishment there would be no reason for him to feel the need to conceal it.

No matter, it was gone for good, now. 

What started as a light peck quickly turned into a fight with himself to contain a primal hunger as he fervently nibbled the skin between his teeth, drawing out a sound that began as his name and left it’s way to a needy groan from Kara as he continued moving along the curve of his neck to stop short on his adam’s apple. When he closed his lips around the lump and sucked on it he felt it coming to a halt, with all air leaving Kara’s body.

Muriel lost time, playing with his exposed skin. He was out of breath and so very, very hard by the time his remaining brain cells beckoned him to pull away. Glancing down, he could barely comprehend his own handiwork. Panic took over when he saw what he’d done. There were dark purple marks covering Kara’s throat, he could even make out the shape of his teeth where the brand used to be. 

He repeated in his head that Kara would tell him if he did something wrong, he would let him know. He repeated that thought until he felt he could breathe again. He tried to put himself in his place, he imagined that he was bound and it was Kara’s lips on him…

He wouldn't have minded it at all.

Letting go of his hold on Kara’s hair, he cupped the side of his face. His thumb brushed along his swollen lips, without a moment’s hesitation, the smaller man complied, parting them ever so slightly. 

It wasn’t Muriel’s intention, per se. Still, he went along with it. He shoved two fingers inside his mouth, more experimentally than anything else, and Kara’s lips closed around them. The heat, and the silky tongue rolling around them awoke something primal within Muriel, and guided by that unfamiliar sensation alongside an almost childish wonder, he pushed them in further. As if he’d been starving, the man accepted it willingly. He should’ve been gagging, Muriel could tell his fingers were past his uvula but judging by the way he was sucking them eagerly, he didn’t have much of a gag reflex.

Too focused on the feeling, he completely forgot Kara’s neglected dick trapped between them until a shift in position caused it to twitch painfully. 

He scissored his fingers around Kara’s tongue to gather as much spit as he could and pulled them out with a pop. He replaced them with his mouth before the man could snap his lips shut again, muffling his gasps with hungry kisses. Just as he did so, wrapped his wet hand around his erection.

Kara pulled away from Muriel to bite down a moan, barely containing it, and leaving Muriel’s lips now a hair's breadth away from his ear. Taking advantage of this opportunity, Muriel nibbled at it before whispering too low, too hoarse to be heard “May I?”

The sound that came out of the other man was a desperate plea, almost a cry “...Please.”

That was more than he needed. He closed his hand around it proper and began jerking him off in a slow, steady rhythm. The angle was a little different than doing it to himself but the general idea was the same. Under him, a series of incoherent syllables were choked down. With his free hand around Kara’s jaw, Muriel turned his face towards himself. “I’d like to hear you.” he said as calmly as he could manage and pressed his thumb on the slit of his dick, spreading the precum.

For a passing second it seemed like he wasn’t going to comply but with Muriel’s last action, his jaw dropped. 

Unable to contain himself any longer, Muriel’s hips thrust up in sync with his hand. He needed relief as well. Soon. 

With little patience, he freed his own dick. He was so hard that it was making him dizzy. He pressed himself down to wrap his fingers around both. Only then he noticed the sheer difference in size. Kara did feel small in his palm before but now seeing his own size in its prime, he was lost for words. He hadn’t seen many people naked ever since he left the orphanage so he had no point of reference for what’s considered average. 

How reckless, for a man of Kara position to propose something like this. And how reckless for a man with Muriel’s past to agree to it.

Everything else he would’ve thought, alongside his momentary reluctance was out the window soon as the smaller man’s hips jerked up meet his hand and he let out a needy moan. Muriel had to push him down lest the friction on his own dick causes him to lose his mind.

“Kara…” he gulped, shaking his head in an attempt to get back his trail of thoughts “What should I do?”

The magician’s mouth opened and closed. He let his head fall back as he took a couple of seconds to find his words. “Whatever you want.” he huffed “So… what do you want?”

The words left him before he can think, “I want to be inside you.”

The bruise on Kara’s adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed hard before speaking “Gods, Muriel… You have no idea how long I’ve been-- I’ve thought about this.”

“Tell me.” he gave a particularly hard jerk as he asked, causing Kara to choke on his next words,

“Since you kissed me. N-no, before that… You had me in your grasp the moment you handed me the myrrh.”

There was something so hopeless and agonizingly pure in the way he spoke. As if he still feared he’d be left out in the cold, as if Muriel could cut him off at any given moment.

With his free hand Muriel caressed the soft skin of Kara’s thigh, he wanted to trail his lips over it, cover it with blushing marks. He wanted to explore his body entirely, learn all the ways he could make him come apart. Leave a mark on him to remind him that it had been Muriel’s touch that made him lose himself, it had been his lips that left him breathless and his name he cried as he came undone. A part of Muriel that he could carry with him even when the memory fades.

His own selfishness disgusted him.

“I--” the man stuttered “I’m sorry I shouldn’t have said anyt--”

Muriel silenced him with a swift kiss, “I need some guidance here, I don’t want to hurt you.”

It wasn’t immediate but eventually the other man nodded, more to himself “I can… I can suck you off or--” he cleared his throat, “I will need prep for the... other.”

It was overwhelming how delicious both of those options sounded but… could he? Could he take Muriel? Even with prep…

“I can do it myself if you want. But… I’ll need my hands.”

He was aware it was supposed to be his choice but both sounded unpleasant for Kara. He’d be the one on the receiving end in either scenario. He slid his hand down towards the curve of Kara’s ass, lightly brushing his fingertips over his entrance and causing the man to shiver. 

“What do I have to do?”

Not that he wanted to keep Kara restrained, he just felt like he should be the one doing it. He should’ve done some research or something. He quite literally never thought he’d be in the position he’s in right now. A grown man asking this,  _ at this point,  _ must’ve been a disappointment for Kara. 

“There is a silver vial on the top drawer.” Kara tilted his head towards the nightstand. Muriel all but folded the poor man in half trying to get to it, consequently finding out that he was quite flexible. He kept on explaining between ragged breaths “It’s to… ease. You’ll need to start with a finger and add more…”

“Is that… pleasant?” Muriel couldn’t help but sound a little dismissive. He knew the idea of it but he never thought about it in dept nor tried anything of the kind on himself. It sounded uncomfortable.

“Yes.” the other man answered with absolute certainty. 

Muriel was distracted by how cute he looked with his face painted a dark crimson. He couldn’t help slipping his hand under the blindfold and sliding it up, revealing his flustered face wholly. As expected, his eyes were unfocused, but there were tears threatening to escape from the edges. His thumb gingerly grazed over the white eyelashes. “Kara, look at me.”

It was such a bizarre request, how could he? But he did, somewhat. His gaze followed the sound of Muriel’s voice to settle somewhere above his cheeks. Glossy as they had been the first time he’d seen them. It was a mystery how something this vacant managed to capture him so, just like the day he’d lost himself in the starry sky that they’d reflected.

“You will tell me if I hurt you?”

“Is it okay if I tell you when it doesn’t feel good?”

He was probably aware that there wasn’t a scenario that didn’t end in at least some amount of pain. But for now, it was agreeable, after all, he had said he’s not opposed to a bit of pain “Yeah.”

He unscrewed the cap, scent of mastic filled his nose. Though when he poured a little and coated two of his fingers, he was glad to discover that the liquid itself wasn’t sticky. After a little while the liquid warmed around his fingers and even started emitting a tingling feeling.

“This thing… it’s no regular concoction.”

“It’s a muscle relaxant.”

“You’ve used this before?”

He nodded before admitting quietly “Not for this.”

Muriel pressed the tip of his coaxed finger on the head of Kara’s erection, partly to tease and partly to try if it would cause discomfort. The man sucked in a breath, immediately tensing his legs to keep himself from bucking into it. 

He trailed his fingers downwards, lingering over his hole just long enough to give Kara a chance to protest. Unsurprisingly, none came.

He pushed a little to determine the resistance. It certainly didn’t feel like the man could take any of his fingers in, much less his entire girth. He glanced back at him, maybe hoping he’d tell him to stop. He would tell Muriel if he wanted him to stop. He would.

It was hard to imagine how any of this would be enjoyable to Kara. Muriel was no empath but he could empathize to a degree, sure, he could imagine being touched by him, kissed by him... he could imagine himself giving into him. But Kara wasn’t a man of Muriel’s caliber. He wasn’t inherently strong enough to cause any real damage, he required pristine focus to channel his strength. It would be damn near impossible for him to harm Muriel by accident. Muriel, on the other hand… he didn’t want his mind to wander to those dark places but he couldn’t push back his horrid thoughts. He would look at Kara’s slim, fragile neck and think if he clasped it too tightly, the man would be done for. If he lost his balance briefly and plunged on his elbow, he’d crush the man’s ribs. If he pulled at his arm a little too harshly, he could dislocate his shoulder. 

He knew, at the back of his mind that it is not that easy to take a life, even bound, people tend to fight back. Maybe there was a thing or two he could learn from the other man’s lack of sight; if Muriel compelled himself to forget what either of them looked like, the fact would remain that the man under him, in the short while they got close, had overcame multiple ordeals that wouldn’t be associated with a man that looked as docile as him.

Perhaps what he was capable of scared him, as it did Muriel. He carried with him a violence he couldn’t understand, knowledge that willed him to attack rather than defend. They didn’t talk about those things, they never talked.

Just like how they never talked about the kiss that both brushed off as an accident, or the lingering touches that would have to break off had anybody acknowledged. Just like how Muriel never told him how he’d stare at him, enamored by the tiny details of his expression, sometimes for hours, knowing that he’d have no idea… 

Kara had been the one who took that step, when he’d admitted that he desired him.  _ Him,  _ a man with enough blood in his hands to paint the whole sea red, a man who’s been nothing but rude to him and incapable of showing or receiving the modicum of affection. It certainly wasn’t something he let himself desire even in his wildest fantasies.

Yet here they were, intertwined with each other.

He pressed the first finger in, doing his best to not put too much pressure behind it. It went in noticeably easy after he passed the initial muscle. Tight, still, but made it seem a little less impossible to manage what they’ve set out to do. He pulled out to pour more of the liquid over it and started with shallow thrusts. 

As he worked his finger he reverted his attention back to Kara who’d gone concerningly silent all of a sudden. He’d been responsive so far so it was a little discouraging for Muriel to not receive any kind of feedback. Though as soon as his gaze fell on the man, it became abundantly clear why. Kara was a mess. His eyes screwed shut, he was biting into his lower lip hard enough to draw blood. An expression which would otherwise indicate an extreme agony shot pangs of pleasure down Muriel’s abdomen. He had to collect himself, Kara could be hurting. He needed to pull himself together.

“Is this… okay?” he managed to ask.

“Yes.” came a weak response.

“Am I hurting you?”

“No.”

“You look like--”

“Muriel!” his voice cut off with a sharp intake of breath, still he sounded as if he was begging instead of demanding but his hips moved in time with his last words, pushing back on Muriel’s hand “...more.”

Seeing him like this, Muriel forgot where he is, what he’s doing… As if overtaken by a compulsion he shoved second finger in, mostly dry. The tight ring of muscle clenched at the intrusion but he didn’t have half a mind to care. In fact, he was free of any thought as he moved them in and out hungrily. Silky, smooth texture of his insides was sucking Muriel’s fingers in and the only thing in his mind was how it would feel to be engulfed with it.

Reveling in the muted sounds he was drawing out of the other man, he scissored his fingers. With that he felt one of his fingertips brush over something and Kara’s spine bent backwards into the mattress, as a delicious moan tore away from his throat. He clenched around him, trying to balance his shaky legs to push back on his hand. Experimentally, Muriel nudged on it again and again, leaving the smaller man curled in himself, trembling all over. 

Muriel went stiff. 

That didn’t look good. He leaned over to see Kara’s expression properly, tugged at the arm that he hid his face under. He didn’t know what he expected but he was afraid that he’d crossed a line he shouldn’t have. 

As if to address to his unvoiced concern, Kara’s lips parted.

“That… that felt amazing.” he managed with a shaky voice.

With a snort Muriel let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. Each time he worried sick he’d done something incredibly wrong it turned out that he was beating himself over virtually nothing. He couldn’t help chuckling softly as he buried his face in the curve of Kara’s neck.

Without warning he added a third finger after lubricating them sufficiently. Kara must surely be feeling the stretch now. Still, he kept his pace earnestly, occasionally rubbing against the bundle of nerves that got the man squirming. He dragged his lips along his pulse down to the collarbone, and even further, to the soft pink nipples. He circled his tongue around it, making it perk up under stimulation. Lightly, he brushed his finger over the other one. He wasn’t certain if it did anything for the other man, his limited knowledge on the matter didn’t include male anatomy. But Muriel liked doing it, so he carried on. He aligned his fingers to that spot inside him at the same time he took one of nipples between his teeth and pinched the other, earning himself another deep moan. Even more precum pooled down Kara’s shaft, glistening under the dim candle light. The man hummed something that can possibly be his name… 

“Hm?”

“I’m going to-- I’m gonna cum if you…” Kara muttered breathlessly.

He hadn’t realized how close he had been pushing the man. He hadn’t even touched his dick all this time yet it stood as painfully hard as when he had his hands on it. Perhaps it would be alright to move things forward. He didn’t know how ‘ready’ Kara needed to be but judging by the way he took three of his fingers with absolutely no complaint he had a hunch that he wasn’t going to get any arguments from the man.

Also, he doubted he himself could hold back for much longer.

There was still an issue, though. One he’d been ignoring so far but now they were at the bridge that needed to be crossed.

“Can I continue?”

Kara nodded encouragingly.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah.” he huffed with less patience

He pulled his fingers out, kissing away a disgruntled groan and much to Kara’s surprise he reached for the bedpost. Unhooking his hands from the wood, he pulled them down between their bodies. The second Kara’s fingers so much grazed over his erection he felt as if he’s going to spend himself right there and then. It was his greatest fight yet.

Kara’s hands immediately wrapped around Muriel’s shaft, mapping it with precise focus. He let out a soft gasp when he realized exactly what he got himself into.

Muriel covered Kara’s tinier hands with his own. He couldn’t help giving himself a few jerks with Kara’s hands but eventually he gathered enough brain power to speak.

“Are you  _ still sure _ ?”

The other man gulped, “You’re… huge.”

He made it sound like it was his first time realizing how very small he was compared to Muriel. 

Muriel sighed, “We can stop.”

“No. Why?” There was childish wonder in his tone where concern should’ve been.

“It’s…” he couldn’t find words to finish his sentence. It’s too much for you? It’s more than you can take?

“It’s bigger than I thought… Doesn’t mean we have to stop. If it doesn’t work out we can always go with plan B.” 

Muriel’s words came out as a whisper, “By then it will be too late. I might hurt you.”

As if this all meant nothing to the man, his lips curled into an almost devilish grin “Do your worst.”

…

_ What. _

“What?!”

He hadn’t even realized he withdrew his hands until Kara’s fingers grappled at the empty space between them, trying to find his, “Muriel, wait!”

“Why would you say that?”

“I’m.. I--” he broke down, almost whimpering “...I just--” he hid his face behind his arms, Muriel could practically see him counting in his head. When he reached five, he took a deep breath and sunk back “Sorry, you’re right. You don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

He did want to, though. That was the problem.

This odd and perhaps unhealthy power play had helped to put his mind at ease. Since they entered this room, Muriel had felt worried, concerned, mostly confused but never tense, never anxious.

“I’m sorry…”

“Kara--” 

“It’s okay--”

“Kara--Kara, hey,” Muriel gently pulled at his arms in an attempt to catch his attention. Sure enough, he let Muriel push them away and reveal his face.

“If you say you’ll be fine,” he placed a swift kiss on his forehead, “I believe you.”

Kara leaned on to the touch “It will be more than ‘fine’ _ . _ ”

“If you say so.” he let out an amused scoff, Kara matched him with a weak smile. “Alright,” he let go, seeing how they were relatively calmer now and still very much aroused. 

He slipped out of his breeches. It had been quite some time since he’d been naked in front of someone. Granted, the magician couldn’t see him, his face idly followed the sound of his steps. He had no reason to feel self conscious about his image. Even so, his hands stilled briefly when he cast his gaze on his own body. 

He didn’t look as terrifying as he did years ago. Unkempt, disproportionate... He was a clear contrast to the man beside him. Sure, Kara couldn’t see his scars, however he could still feel his calloused fingers, rough lips or rugged skin. 

He made himself believe that he didn’t care about other people’s opinions, but he didn’t want Kara to think less of him. It felt too wonderful to be desired by him. It made him feel human again. And in a sense, the gratification he derived from it outweighed the risk of rejection. If there was the slightest chance for him to satiate Kara’s desires, he was compelled to take it.

There wasn’t much of the balm left, he’d been too generous with it, apparently. He looked at the tiny vial in his hand, and back at Kara. They had one possible solution…

“Kara,” 

The man’s face perked up,

“Do you have more of this concoction? We’re almost out.” 

He shook his head, but the edges of his mouth twitched up, “We can start with plan B.” 

“You sure?” Muriel asked, pressing his thumb between his lips. He didn’t give a reply but his tongue peered out to playfully lick a small line on his finger. 

A little reluctantly, Muriel guided him to his dick, it was standing proudly few inches away from Kara’s face. The enthusiasm in the way Kara grasped at it despite his restrains and nuzzled at its base overwhelmed him, thought it was nothing compared to the sensation of the lips trailing over his shaft. Before he could wrap his head around the matter at hand a pathetic sound escaped his lips and he found himself clutching tightly at Kara’s hair in an attempt to get a grip on reality.

“...Your hands...”

“Leave them.” he brushed Muriel off, and pressed his lips on the vein reaching from his head to base “unless… you want me to finish you off with my mouth?”

The thought made Muriel groan.

Kara was hard at work, pushing his foreskin down to close his lips around the tip. He sucked on it gingerly but it was enough to knock the air out of Muriel. His fist clenched around Kara’s locks, forcing him to stop, he would lose it if they kept going.

Kara let out a lively chuckle, “It’s okay, Muriel. Take the initiative.”

Easier said than done, Muriel thought. If he were to follow his instincts blindly he would be done in a flash.

There was hunger in Kara’s expression, a hungry growl he suppressed way too fast at the back of his throat as he obediently stilled himself. He wouldn’t peep a word of complaint but Muriel noticed that his body looked strained, twisted to the side of the bed where Muriel stood. 

He yanked Kara away, pushed him back on the mattress and climbed on top. Straddling the smaller man’s torso between his knees, he aligned himself to lightly press on his mouth. Lips parted expectantly, but he made no move until Muriel’s hand on his hair pushed him forward. Without being told, he took Muriel in as much as he was able, rolled his tongue around the length in his mouth and bobbed his head back slightly, sucking. Inbetween the hazy pleasure and lewd slurping noises he could scarcely notice how odd the other man looked with his mouth stretched to its limits trying to accommodate Muriel’s sizable girth. It was more of a surprise that he even managed, and he kept going.

Pliantly, he began moving his head in sync with Muriel’s hand. It felt so incredible that he hadn’t realized when his grip stilled and his hips started thrusting on their own as the lithe figure lay almost motionless beneath him. He watched his length disappear in and out of Kara’s lips, hypnotized. He yearned for more than he allowed himself to, because Kara allowed him. He allowed him and he wasn’t backing down, he wasn’t telling him to stop.

Steered purely by instinct, he picked up the pace. In a particularly deep thrust he wrenched Kara’s head forth in time with his hips and felt himself hit the back of his throat, and slide even further. The tissue around him clenched at intrusion and drew a moan from the man whose face was pressed all the way at the base of Muriel’s shaft. 

Muriel’s eyes rolled all the way back with the vibration, accompanied by the pressure. He could feel the slight huff of air from Kara’s nose prickling his skin as the man struggled to breathe. 

Finishing in his mouth looked like a pretty good idea right about now.

Damned magician was pushing him to the brink of insanity. With an annoyed grunt, he managed to pull himself out. Or rather, pulled the man aside.

The rough edge of his motion quickly softened when he saw Kara broke free coughing. His face was an absolute wreck; with his puffy eyes, and swollen lips fighting desperately to inhale however much they could through a ravaged throat. Each breath that drew out a quiet wheeze sounded like a struggle to take. 

Muriel was at a lost, again. Should he be concerned? Should he play along? Did he go too far?

Instead, he wiped his own precum mixed with spit from Kara’s chin and brought their lips together. He could taste himself on Kara’s lips, a heavy and bitter savour. In any other time he would cringe at the thought of tasting himself but it was oddly sweet on Kara’s lips. He licked at it, as if he intended to clean the man.

Despite the vicious panting Kara still seemed engrossed by any form of treatment he received from Muriel. Hard as it was to believe, he did know himself best after all.

Muriel had so little willpower, and even less patience left to drag this out any longer. He was practically shaking with the idea of being inside him.

He moved back to his previous position between Kara’s legs. It was different now, feeling Kara’s skin brush over his own. Way too soft compared to the hemp fabric of his pants. How weird would it look now if he rubbed his entire body over Kara’s? Quite, he concluded. 

He dragged Kara towards himself as he bent his legs to fold him in half, putting his ass on display. He put a little bit of his weight on Kara’s thighs and gently pressed them on his torso to test his flexibility. He looked unaffected, though the position hardly looked comfortable. He shivered, when Muriel’s hands slid to his exposed entrance. 

He was still slick with his earlier treatment but still Muriel showed two thumbs in him to ease the liquid and pulled them apart, watching the pink, puckered rim stretch. He felt himself drawn to it with and urge to taste it. 

He knew people with different bits liked that sort of thing, he didn’t know about this. He never touched himself like this, never so much thought of it. He should’ve asked Asra, he would know what to do. He could ask Kara, surely he wouldn’t laugh in his face. Not while bent in half, anyhow. But then he had a feeling he already knew the answer. As always, he’d tell Muriel to do what he wanted.

He decided to leave it for now. Making a mental note to talk to Kara about it later, preferably when the arousal between his legs isn’t draining all blood from his head.

After he applied a little bit of the lotion on himself, his hands found their way back on Kara’s ass. Hauling him up, he poured the remaining of it over his entrance, causing the man to shudder under the unexpected chill.

He lined himself up between Kara’s thighs. Holding his breath, he pushed in. Slowly, at first, but he wasn’t sure at what point he ended up with his hands tightly locked around Kara’s legs while he sheathed himself almost all the way to the hilt. It was Kara’s broken scream that brought Muriel back. His tiny hands were fisted on Muriel’s chest, with no force behind them. 

He wasn’t telling him to stop.

He wasn’t.

Muriel’s thought process started and ended there. All that mattered was for him to cease at Kara’s word. A word that never came. Perhaps it was the ecstasy that had clouded his judgement, yet he felt saner than ever. His mind was clear when he waited for a response, waited for the hands to push him back. 

He was too brash, he thought Kara felt much too tight, that he must be in great pain. But in truth, he didn’t know. Kara had already came clean about his preferences and it was quite obvious how Muriel’s actions affected him. Muriel had nothing more to believe what he could see with his eyes, hear with his own ears, feel under his own skin. If Kara could put his trust in him for this, Muriel owed it to him to return that. It was the agreement they’ve made. 

_ Do as you please. _

He pulled out slightly to thrust back in, causing the man to clench around him and by Gods it felt maddening, urging him to let go. He managed to slow himself somewhat, setting a rather gentle rhythm until he was certain that Kara could take more. He tried to align himself for that spot he discovered earlier. It took some time but eventually he got Kara writhing beneath him. 

Muriel picked up the pace, chasing those delightful sounds. He grabbed the hands left on his chest firmly and pinned them above Kara’s head as he adjusted the position to sink himself even deeper. 

He felt like an animal, rutting with reckless abandon. Kara’s entire body was bouncing with the mattress, not capable of anything more than taking his pounding ragdoll. His knuckles had gone white from clutching on the bedpost, and for that matter, Muriel was quite sure his grip around Kara’s wrists was hard enough to break a bone. Folded in half beneath Muriel, it was hard to make out whether he was flustered or couldn’t breathe but every word that poured out of his swollen lips was a ravenous encouragement;  _ Harder, faster, yes, right there…  _

Muriel wouldn’t be able to tell exactly what he was saying, only that he wasn’t asked to stop. Even as he whined and begged for something Muriel didn’t exactly know how to give, the wet noises of skin slapping on skin and Muriel’s own throaty groans drowned it out. If he were to be rougher he would certainly snap the man in two, it was a wonder how he hadn’t split open with larger man’s relatively generous girth pounding in and out of his narrow hips. 

Even though it was a long time coming Muriel’s own orgasm took him by surprise. He buried his head in the crook of Kara’s neck as he spilled himself deep inside. By the time he could somewhat get a hold of his body he pulled out to discover that he wasn’t done at all, not by a long shot. He wasn’t even remotely flaccid.

This had never happened before. He thought he had an average recuperation span, at least fifteen minutes or so. It wasn’t exactly uncomfortable but in all honesty he didn’t know what to do with it now.

Kara’s legs were still trembling, laxly fixed around Muriel’s waist. He didn’t seem to notice persistence of Muriel’s sex drive. He decided to have another go, he still had a job to do. Claiming Kara’s lips in a lazy, drawn out kiss, Muriel savoured each sound that came as he pushed in again. Sensitive though he was from the previous orgasm, this time he felt more in control. He pushed in slowly, relishing in the warm tightness of his partner. Instead of sheathing himself fully, he went directly for the nerves. His thrusts were careful, calculated. Steadily, he gave the man time to recover. 

Kara’s panting turned into low, battered moans gradually. That’s when Muriel reached down between them to get a hold of his dick. It didn’t take much to pump him to full hardness. 

It must’ve been the sex, or the man spread out beneath him that forced the words out. Everything passed his mind suddenly began to pour freely,

“You’re beautiful…” he mumbled while his free hand caressed every inch of skin it could cover. “So beautiful… so good for me…” every bit of him was perfect, “...only for me.”

This was too much, he didn’t deserve it. Yet, those didn’t seem to matter one bit. They were all tomorrow’s worries.

He could tell Kara was getting close, it was probable that he couldn’t even comprehend anything Muriel was blabbering. He didn’t care, he just couldn’t keep it in anymore. 

He sped up, forcing more cries from the man. His slipped his fingers under the straps around his wrists. With a tug, they came loose. As soon as they were freed, Kara’s hands found Muriel’s face, grazing his cheeks with a light touch. They laced in Muriel’s hair. The gentle touch soon turned into a fierce fight to hold on when Muriel began pounding into him earnestly. His hands clutched at Muriel’s hair, digging into his scalp as he was pushed over the edge. With Muriel’s name on his lips, his entire body spasmed around him.

Muriel kept his punishing pace to work him through the orgasm, building up to his own release. 

It took him way longer than the first time but the reward was all the more intense. Dots prickled at the edges of his vision as the feeling overtook him. Fingers sank in the tender flesh of Kara’s hips, he kept his firm grip until he came down from the euphoria.

Utterly wasted, he fell next to the man. He couldn’t remember the last time he felt his mind this empty, incapable of producing a single thought. Beside him, Kara was still panting loudly. It sounded raspy. Painful. If Muriel didn’t have his head buried in the pillow, he may have checked to see his condition. However he currently had zero stamina left to move a single muscle. 

He felt Kara’s hand on his head, idly playing with his hair. It was a gesture he came to associate with the man, a kindness he didn’t allow anyone to show him before. Fingers gingerly untangling his knots beckoned him to sleep. It was the last thing he felt before drifting into a dreamless slumber.

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and comments are always welcome!


End file.
